Strike the Tree
by Daisy Field
Summary: She is not quite Tsuna, and yet, she is. Everything and nothing has changed. (Or, in which someone is reborn and finds out a bit too late that changing the future has consequences. Some of which she is not willing to pay.)SI as Fem!Tsuna. Reincarnation, self insert, SI, the usual.
1. Prologue

**Warnings:** Major character deaths, obviously violence and foul language. If canon is sacred to you, then this might not be the fic for you.

 **Disclaimer:** Obviously I do not own KHR

AN at the bottom.

* * *

His body thuds onto the ground in front of her.

Pause.

A breath.

And then a name is tearing its way past her lips in a panicked screech, hanging into the empty air.

"Run," He rasps, weakly batting her hands away from the holes that quickly bloom wet patches on his chest. When did those appear? Has his breaths always been this ragged? She isn't quite sure of anything anymore, too caught up in the madness and chaos of the day's events. All she knows is this: her hands come away stained an almost unnaturally bright red.

Tugging at his limp body to move, to pull him to the safety that now seems impossibly far away reveals the futility of her actions. She knew it, he knew it. There is no way they could both continue unless he could move himself. As her hands reach to pull his arms over her small shoulders in attempt to carry him away, he stops her with another soft plea to leave.

Trembling fingers grasps his instead, and they both fumble for a tight grip.

"No," Her vicious snarl echoes with a surprising force, "I'm not going to leave you alone."

The ' _again_ ' was left unsaid, but still understood with the squeeze of their fingers.

"Don't let go," She orders, her tone half begging, the other half is hitching with pitchy sobs. A calloused hand, now slick with blood, attempts to brush her hair back, a thumb wiping at her cheeks. It leaves bright red streaks across her face, garish paint standing out against her hair that is already caked with things that she does not want to think about.

He gives a slight squeeze, tugging her closer to where his lips form inaudible words. She pulls away and shakes her head. "You can tell me later, you're not going to d-die today."

There is a more insistent tug, and she sees the urgency in his eyes. They both know that there is no point, that too many wounds have built up to leave only one ending. His gaze softens when she finally nods, and his fingers intertwine with hers in a reassuring hold.

Her head bends down— in defeat, in grief, in regret —and his lips tickle when they brush the edge of her ear to breath a few syllables that has her own lips twitch upwards and the tears flow a little faster. She repeats them back to him in private whispers, and something in her expression must have shown, because he gives a slow, soft smile before bright eyes warm with affection stills on her and begins to dull.

And she feels, oh how she **_feels_** , his Flames flicker once, before it winks out. Oh god, it hurts at the absence, the resulting searing cold knocks the breath right out of her, leaving her gasping at the loss. He was _hers_ , hers to protect and yet here his body lay, in her thin and weak arms.

 _(And in this moment, she can truly understand what it means to be a broken Sky)_

It's so much worse than what she had ever expected.

Nono _nono **nono**_

This isn't supposed to happen, it was supposed to be different this time. What went so wrong, she is stronger than before, so why was his body lying there instead of her own? All she wanted was for everyone to be safer. What changed? When did this start? The only thing different is—

 _Oh_.

Did, she realizes with dawning horror, did _she_ do this? Had her presence changed so much?

 _Yes,_ her mind whispers, _you've overstepped your boundaries. You should have left things be. Too greedy, too selfish, and look at you've done._

"Sorry," She chokes, hand slipping away from a cooling grasp, "I'll fix things."

She ignores the presence that still stands in front of her.

"Oh?" There is a cruel smile that slowly curves into pale cheeks. "Fix things, you say?"

"Haven't you done enough?"

She curls tighter around the body that grows heavier every moment.

The muzzle, still burning from the recent shots that blew away a part of her heart(because she is still alive, but never quite the same), presses into her forehead. Of course it's a gun. It was always that one weapon that took away the most important things from her. And somehow, that coldly impersonal method always hurts the most.

"What are you going to do next, little Sky?"

Weary eyes drag themselves to level with another coldcoldcold pair. They must have seen the decision in her expression, because there is a click and fingers squeeze the trigger.

"Things would've been different had you not interfered."

A gunshot rings through the air.

* * *

 **AN** : *ignores the fact that I haven't updated in literal years.* I know this is short, and still no promises on updating schedule because college is a cruel and sadistic place. And while this fic has like 20 chapters planned in advance, they are still largely unwritten. Also, this is just the prologue, a short snippet of what the future entails. It's meant to be a bit vague on who the characters are(well, except for one, you can already guess who). Next chapter is when the story actually begins.

...Did I mention that prior to beginning this, I had never read nor watched KHR? Only read a few fanfics of it and whoops there goes another plot bunny (or twenty).

But surely, some may think, I've read it now, after making the biggest plot outline of my life?

*nervous chuckle* Of course I have, that would be the smart thing to do, right?

Are any of you interested in BNHA and/or Harry Potter? If not, too bad, I also have outlines for them too, though not quite as large as this.


	2. Chapter 1

**Warnings** : Mentions of gun violence, a highly controversial topic right now. If this is a touchy subject, please stop reading when you see the section start with bolded words ' **The** ', (not ' **she'** , that's different)especially the section after that one. I will provide a short summary of those sections at the bottom for those who choose to skip it, as they do contain some plot relevant information.

* * *

Nana loved her child.

Tsu-chan was the most adorable kid she had ever seen, a perfect mix of her and her dear Iemitsu with large tawny eyes and soft fluffy brown hair. She had never thought she could love anyone as much as her dear husband, until the doctor placed the small, fragile, _precious_ , bundle in her arms, and with warm weight pressed against her chest, she _cried_. Her daughter, she finally had a _daughter_ , after two heartbreaking miscarriages, and she would _neverlethergo._

Iemitsu wasn't much better either, having also broken down when he saw his child for the first time, and she laughed at his expression as he struggled to wipe his tears while carefully cradling Tsunayoshi(after her dear friend, may he rest in peace). He eventually gave up, deciding to grin softly at his firstborn instead.

This time, _this time_ , she would protect her Tsu-chan. Nothing would take this one away from her, (she didn't think she could survive another loss, they'd have to get past her dead body before anyone would harm a head on her child).

She truly loved her daughter, and yet…

The baby had never smiled at anyone. Tsuna was a quiet child, and she flinched whenever Nana reached for her. When the nightmares first started three months after her birth, (those _screams_ ), she had bolted up the stairs with frantic thoughts of ' _no, not again, not this one, please_ ', she found her child alone. Any attempts in comforting her ended with a panicked flinch away, and she finally scooped Tsuna up into her arms, regardless of the weak flails that pounded into her chest. Shaky hands had rubbed warm circles into the shivering form, and a half choked hum slowly calmed the sobbing into quiet hiccups.

What was going on, what would a three month old even have nightmares about?

She had called her husband the next day.

A trip to the doctor yielded little information, nothing other than confused head scratches and a half hearted ' _give it some time_ '. Iemitsu had stormed out of the hospital with their small family in tow and dark mutters under his breath. She hadn't seen that doctor since then.

 _What's wrong_ , she whispered to the wrapped bundle that lay in her arms, _please, let me help, don't you know how much I love you_?

The child, predictably, stayed silent, face screwed up in an exhausted expression that mirrored her mother's.

* * *

Her husband had left a few days after the disastrous visit to the doctor, with choked apologies and soft promises of _I'll fix this._

Why was he leaving, Nana wanted to scream, their _child_ was _hurting_ , and just, for once in his life, why couldn't he place his family over his job? She loved her husband, had known that marrying him would mean accepting his constant absences, but it was so _hard_. _He's doing his best_ , she reminded herself. A quiet voice in the back of her mind sneered about how selfish she was, but after months and months of her Tsuna screaming like she was _dying_ , Nana needed the support with the stress in comforting her daughter. But she kept her thoughts to herself and gave a soft smile, eyes pinched in fatigue, and waved Iemitsu's regret-filled apologies away with an _it's alright, I know you're busy_. There wasn't enough patience left in her to feel any guilt over his torn expression. He still left.

Four months passed.

It seemed that the only thing that could stave off the nightly fits were her humming half remembered lullabies and softly petting the downy hair until both of them were asleep. The newly bought crib went mostly unused as Tsuna was moved to sleep with Nana.

 _Please,_ she pleaded once after another round of consoling her hysterical daughter, _I love you so much_ , _I'd never let anything hurt you, I_ _ **promise**_.

She would never give up on Tsunayoshi, _her lucky miracle_ , but she was just so tired. It didn't help that she felt like a failure of a mother who couldn't even keep her child happy. What was she doing wrong?

Were all those sleepless nights worth it? The thought was quickly banished with horror and self disgust.

 _Yes_ , Nana fiercely thought, when she woke up to her daughter tightly clinging to her shirt and a soft, not-quite-a-smile, but still _peaceful_ expression. She quickly wiped relieved tears away before her Tsuna could wake up and see.

* * *

 **She** had not regained 'consciousness' at first.

It was a bit hard to gain her bearings when she had to relive her death every single night, leaving her exhausted the next day. It didn't help when all she vaguely recalled from those nights were visions of hot metal pressing against her head(she wasn't the first one), a _wide wide wide_ grin, and an overwhelmingly loud _bang_.

The _cold cold cold_ fear only abated whenever she clung to a _warm warm warm_ body and the quiet, but hoarse humming. By the time she became aware of something besides the grief(where was her best friend?), seven months had apparently passed by since her death.

She blinked, and turned towards the doorway of the room where she was currently hugging a giant stuffed lion that absolutely _dwarfed_ her tiny form. She had promptly dubbed it Kaiser. There was a slight _warmth_ slowly walking towards where she was sitting under the lion's head-good god the mane was so _soft_ -and sharp eyes quietly tracked it, before locking onto the fuzzy shape that appeared in front of her.

"Mama."

The first thing that came into focus were the warm brown eyes. She hadn't seen anyone look at her with such love before, as the only thing she could recall from her past parents were mutual feelings of disappointment and frustration. Which, she could understand, as they had been arguing about her choice of career for years now-they insisted that she was a smart girl, who would be of great help in the medical field. But she had been stuck with doubts, because she wasn't selfless enough to tend to people who she didn't give a fuck about.

The second thing she noticed was the soft smile that practically _sparkled_ at her. If she squinted, a flowery background could be seen, and were those faint angelic _choirs_? Wow. She needed to learn how to do that.

"Ah, Tsu-chan," The woman— _Mama_ , purred her instincts—cooed, before murmuring several unintelligible words at her, gently petting her downy hair. Yep, she still couldn't understand anything but her apparent name and 'mama.' It sounded faintly asian in nature, although she certainly wasn't a linguistic expert. The only way she was reasonably sure that her name was either 'Tsu-chan', or 'Tsuna' was the amount of time it was repeated around her. Though, she wasn't sure which one of the two was her actual name. Maybe it was Tsuna? Eh, she was a quick learner, she'd figure it out soon enough. Just like she figured out that she was reincarnated into some weird baby.

At this point, the idea didn't sound so strange, not when the evidence was right in front of her. Either she was insane and was hallucinating this whole thing, or she was now a baby, and this woman was her mother. She prefered the latter option, she didn't feel like she had lost her sanity. That sounded like something a crazy person would think.

Anyway, if she was going to be honest, a small part of her wanted a fresh start. Another lifetime to figure out what she wanted to do, what her purpose would be. And that, she thinks as she leans contentedly against Mama, wouldn't be so bad.

* * *

 **The** lights were always out. A dark haze blurred out any recognizable features from every face she saw. The screams still echoed clearly in the hallway outside as she curled in the corner, flinching at the gunshots.

"Not real", she whispers, covering her ears as the popping gets louder, "It's not real".

This was just a dream.

A whimper escapes as the doors slam open. She doesn't breath, is frozen in fear as loud laughter rings in the room.

"Get up," the order is barked, and the popping repeats, once, twice, and thrice, as more people sob. The metallic smell grows stronger.

Just a dream. Not real. She wasn't the cowering student anymore, she was Tsuna, she was safe, and this was _just a dream_.

They come closer to her hiding place.

No _T rEaL_.

They pause a few feet away from her.

 _JuSt a_ _ **DrE aM**_.

Footsteps come closer.

HeLp.

Muzzle to her head. She recoils.

 _please._

All she can see is the smile.

 _someone._

"Bye bye."

someone _please_ _ **HeLp ME**_.

And

Then

They

Disappear.

The room, the metallic smell, everything fades away into nothingness. Everything that is, except for the little boy.

"Who are you," The boy frowns at her with a particular intensity, "and why are you still here?"

"Who am I," Tsuna dumbly repeats, "who are _you_?"

"I asked you first."

"And I asked you second."

"...That doesn't even make sense."

" _You_ don't even make sense."

"Stop repeating everything I say."

" _You_ stop repeating everything I say."

They glare at each other for a few moments before Tsuna snorts and breaks into gasping giggles. The nightmares, while no longer resulting in her waking in screams and flailing, still caused her much unneeded stress, nevermind the fact that it had been two years since she had been reborn.

To have that suddenly be broken by this boy, who looked cautiously at her at the sudden outburst and was now waving his hand at her as if he was swatting away a fly? What was her brain even doing, sending her hallucinations of little boys who waved her nightmares away? The sheer ridiculousness and relief at the situation brought another round of hysterical laughter and tears.

"What," She gasps as her cheeks ached, "what are you even _doing_?"

He scowls with a surprising amount of adorable indignation and confusion."You're not going away like the others."

" _You're_ the figment of my imagination, why aren't you going away?"

The boy started to retort, but there was a sudden disturbance as the world flickered in and out of focus. They both glanced at each other.

"I'm waking up." He muttered.

" _I'm_ the one waking up from this dream."

He threw her another exasperated glare as things quickly faded away and mist shrouded his form.

* * *

Orange-brown eyes blinked open to the familiar dark bedroom. Still night, huh.

 _I didn't even get his name,_ She realized dazedly.

Though it didn't really matter that much, considering he _was_ some ridiculous hallucination, probably the result of inadequate sleep. Or maybe this was an unconscious coping method of hers, conjuring up little boys to have...childish arguments?

.

.

.

...Actually, she was going to go with the former. The latter made her feel a bit dirty.

Nana blearily woke up when she felt her daughter shiver in disgust. Absentmindedly, she tucked the blanket in around them, and kissed her child's forehead.

"Go back to sleep, Tsu-chan. I'll be here."

It was a peaceful night after that.

* * *

 **AN** : I had planned and written most of this almost a year ago, and was hesitant to post this. However, her death _is_ relevant to this story. Also, the next 2-3 chapters are roughly finished, but they need some more smoothing out. Next chapter will be more lighthearted, I promise. I'm adding a bunch of fluff and sweetness to even out the occasional angst in the story(to make it hurt even more).

 _Short summary of the section for those of you who chose to skip them_ :

Starts as a dream where Tsuna relives her death. Despite having a shaky control on the dream, the dream soon overtakes her, and she is swept up in the blinding fear. You learn that she was a student who died in a shooting. Also that it has been two years since she was reborn, and that she has learned to (mostly) suppress the screams and flailing upon waking from the nightmares of her death. Just as she is about to 'die' again in the dream world, everything vanishes, leaving a mystery boy in its place. They have a childish argument. She wakes up in the middle of the night, but soon falls back asleep to a peaceful rest.


End file.
